Our Adoption Journey

Final Post-

2009-11-08T18:16:00.002-05:00

I am so excited to finally be at the point where it is time to make this final post. Our adoption is now complete and we are so thankful for everyone who has walked this journey with us. One of the goals we had for this blog was to document this journey, that we may never forget the path God has had us on. This road was much longer, much richer, and much more difficult than we ever imagined ---- and God has been faithful!

We have met so many incredible people on this journey! To each of you, please know that we will continue to pray for each of you, and for those of you still journeying the adoption road, please know that you are close to our hearts.

We invite you to follow the rest of our journey at celebratingchaos.blogspot.com

Many Blessings!

Names

2009-11-06T10:00:00.003-05:00

It seems that in the adoption world there are many different opinions on changing or giving a child a new name when you bring them home. As we have journeyed this path, we felt led to give the boys a new first name, adding it to their given Haitian name. We have seen in scripture how God has given followers new names when they began their walk with Him, and we as parents have chosen names for our other kids as well. We believe this is a very personal decision, and wanted to talk to the boys about it to see how they felt about this change before we actually began calling them by their new names.

All of that said, the boys very easily took to their new names and when they realized the names rhymed with the other kids names, they were delighted! On our blogs we have chosen to keep our kids name private so for that matter, Ezechias will become J and Ezechiel will become A.

Homecoming!

2009-11-04T08:10:00.004-05:00

Our second day of travel began very early, but we didn't arrive home until around 3:30pm. Unfortunately one of the boys felt terrible, ran a fever, and literally slept all day long -- except for when we made him drink something or change planes, etc.. By the time we finally landed for the last time, he was beginning to perk up, watched the landing and greeted the people waiting for us.

We were so blessed to be greeted by so many precious family and friends who have been such a support and encouragement to us along the way! It truly was a precious experience! The boys, although overwhelmed by much at this point, quietly shook hands and said hello to everyone. I know they can't fully understand what it was all about, but someday I know they will look back at the pictures and listen to the story once again, and be reminded about how much we love them and have waited for them! I don't ever want them to forget that God is involved and has a plan for them!

It Has Been A Whirlwind!

2009-11-04T07:49:00.003-05:00

I cannot believe that one week ago today I was on my way to Miami to bring home our precious boys! We spent 3 days flying, and came home to a very full schedule and family! We had no problems at all with our flights, people graciously traded seats with us when they realized the boys would be sitting by themselves, and they were great travelers -- although weary by the end.

Just a note for those of you who plan to fly in and out like we did-- on the immigration form that you have to fill out with an address of where you are staying -- put "in transit". The PAP immigration office didn't quite know what to do with us, but it was resolved relatively easily. As we filed out of the airport my greatest fear was that no one would be there -- which proved to be the case. Fortunately, a dear friend had reminded me to seek out one particular employee who has assisted us each time we have traveled. He quickly took us to the orphanage where we were able to visit a few minutes and then returned in plenty of time to catch our returning flight.

The boys were dressed in matching clothes and looked so good! They were eager to leave for the airport and couldn't wait to get on the plane. By the time we arrived in Miami and got through immigration -- which was only about a 45 minute wait -- we all were starving! The boys enjoyed their first American meal at Chili's, one with a hamburger kids meal and one with a cheeseburger kids meal! By the time we got back to the hotel the boys were ready for bed, and truthfully so were we!

After tucking in those precious smiles, we sat on the couch reflecting God's provision on us- in spite of the painfully long wait, we were grateful! Rob compared the last few days to that of his wait during one of my deliveries. You know what is coming is good, but all of the unknowns can be so overwhelming!

We are grateful, we are blessed!

Coming Home Pictures!

2009-11-01T16:55:00.002-05:00

God is so Good! The trip went well, and though not everything went as planned it was all very smooth! The boys came out with huge smiles on their faces and were ready to go! They couldn't wait to get onto the plane, but after 2 days of traveling they were sure ready to get off of the last one! Too much waiting in airports!

It is amazing the changes in them in just a couple of days! They are opening up more and more all the time and doing great! They already love to ride their bikes, have scootered to the park, and played soccer in the culdesac. We praise God for these precious guys!

WE ARE HOME!

2009-10-30T20:36:00.002-04:00

Just wanted to post a short note to let you know that we have our boys and are home! I cannot begin to tell you home wonderful it is to know that tonight, they are sleeping here, under our roof! They are exhausted, somewhat overwhelmed, but home!! God's covering over us was very clear and we are thankful for all that He has done!

We will post pics and more later!

2009-10-26T12:51:00.002-04:00

Changes are just around the corner for our family and there are many questions that I am sure all of our kids will be asking (along with the many we have already talked about!). I came across a wonderful post on helping your kids understand that we love them all no matter who they are, what color their skin is, or what they have done. I am pretty sure this is a lesson we will revisit sometime in the near future. Check it out here

Love These Boys!

2009-10-23T16:13:00.002-04:00

Not only did we receive great news about our Visa appointment today, but we were able to talk to the boys and received this picture!! How this warms our hearts, you can't even imagine! It wasn't that they had much to say to us, but it was so good to hear their sweet voices! Probably the neatest thing was that one of the boys specifically asked to speak to their big brother by name! We were amazed that they even remembered his name, and he was very talkative with him! I just can't wait until we are all together!

WE HAVE A VISA APPOINTMENT!

2009-10-23T07:40:00.003-04:00

What great news to start our day! On Monday morning our boys will be taken for their Visa appointment! Please pray that this goes well, that they have all the needed documents, and the visas are printed quickly!

My devotional this morning was to Trust Until the End and that has been hard. Waiting is just hard! This journey never seems to get any easier, but GOD IS GOOD, we are praying and trusting the boys will be home very soon!

2009-10-21T08:20:00.004-04:00

While we are at such an exciting place in our adoption, I have been reminded so vividly this morning that the number of families still waiting to bring their kids home is overwhelming.

So many of you have prayed for us, supported and encouraged us on this very long road -- and we are ever so thankful for you! But as I think of all the families we know who are still waiting for news, waiting for their kids -- will you please remember them as well? The call to adoption is just the beginning, and the journey isn't easy.

We Are Doing the Happy Dance

2009-10-20T11:45:00.002-04:00

It has been a very emotional week and a half, but it has resulted with Great News!! WE HAVE OUR I-600 APPROVAL!!! We are still waiting to hear a time for the Visa Appointment, but we truly are so thankful for the great things God has done for us!! We will be able to travel shortly after that appointment and bring the boys home!!!!

2009-10-16T11:38:00.002-04:00

It has been a week! A week since I cried more than I have ever cried in my life. A week where we spent hours on the phone seeking help and direction with so many people. A week where God showed his faithfulness -- that He is still here in the midst of our problems and pain. A week where God asked me to fully surrender our adoption timeline into His hands -- to trust solely Him.

The major issue we were dealing with was expired fingerprints -- literally they expired last week when we thought we had another month. I had mixed up the dates with our I-600 expiration and was devastated! We have so little control in this adoption, yet the one thing I can control fell apart. I was heartbroken, I was guilty, and I felt betrayed -- why would God let me do this?

On top of this we had a very difficult time finding anyone who knew how we should move ahead. Our I-600a had expired b/c we had a current I-600 in Haiti. After many prayers and days of calling, God provided us with an appointment for this morning! Previously we have waited more than a month just to get an appointment!

I have to say God was here -- is here and I am still learning to trust Him completely!

I have to share that one official that we spoke with this week said, "You know, adoptions from Haiti are very difficult." To which Rob replied, "Tell us about it. We started this 33 months ago!" Even that official did a double take with that timeline!

I know there are others out there who have been in process just as long or even longer, and my heart breaks for all those waiting. I don't think I will ever forget how difficult this road is and will always be praying for those coming behind us.

2009-10-11T13:07:00.002-04:00

NOTHING has been easy in this journey! NOTHING. I have questioned God, my faith has been shaken, I have cried more than any other time in my life, and I have been broken. We are weary, yet by God's grace we still find ourselves standing.

Even though we are steps away from bringing the boys home, we have once again found ourselves facing another dilemma that we do not understand or even have any idea of how to move through it. We cannot get answers from anyone who should know and we are heartbroken about losing any more time with our precious boys.

I have felt that perhaps God really has turned his back on us, or perhaps we really did miss his leading. But yet, He still proves Himself to us. Throughout the tears, God brought devotionals into my life reminding me of His perfect plans, of trust, and His provision. He brought encouragement from a couple of friends who had no idea we were struggling, but who reached out to us without knowing we were hurting. He prompted the hearts of a local ministry to come along-side of us to bless and encourage us.

I wish He seriously would have just 'fixed' our problem, but although that hasn't yet been His plan, He has not abandoned us. And for that I am thankful. We are praying for deliverance, but through it all may we stand in His strength and keep our focus on Him alone.

God Uses a Bike to Remind Us of His Goodness

2009-09-25T20:57:00.004-04:00

One of the conversations I have had with the boys has to do with bikes. They definitely wanted bikes, and in particular one of the boys requested a red bike. With the realization that we are getting so close to bringing them home, I decided it was time to start looking for a bike -- and to start praying. I really believed God would bring us a red bike.

For weeks I have been watching Craig's list, garage sales, ebay, Amazon, and every store around for this red bike. I have found only 1 -- and it is quite a bit over our price range. Recently we were discussing 'what we still need to get' before the boys come home with some friends, and this subject came up. One of the guys in our housechurch said "I can probably get you one." "Why didn't you ask me?" As it turns out this gentleman works for Huffy and today sent me an email saying he would have a bike for us next week! Thank you Jesus!

Now we just need the little boy for this bike!!!

2009-09-22T08:54:00.002-04:00

God keeps inching us closer and we are so hopeful the boys truly will be home soon! The medicals are done and our file was submitted to USCIS a week ago. Praying for quick approval!

One of the lessons God continues to teach me is still about trust! Why is it so hard to let go and let Him drive!! I have been looking at our schedule -- "planning" out when the 'best' time, I believe, the boys should come home. Wouldn't it be much better if I simply trusted Him for His plan and His timing? Ugh! I wish I didn't have such a thick head, but praising God for his patience.

I am still seeking you Lord, and KNOW you have it covered!

WE HAVE TWO PASSPORTS!

2009-09-14T22:02:00.002-04:00

I have no idea what was involved in getting this special investigation to the boy's passports, but God did it!! And we are so excited!!! Now the wait moves into Visas. I can only pray this goes quickly and we have them home soon!

Praise Be To God!!!

2009-09-09T16:24:00.002-04:00

How much longer Lord? This is and has been the cry of my heart for so long. We began this adoption over 2 1/2 years ago and we keep running into roadblocks. My faith is shaken and my heart is weary.

I wish I had the faith to move mountains, but His will is not necessarily my will. I know delay is not denial, but my heart grieves for the time lost. This adoption has taught me much about God, much about prayer, and much about grief and loss. It has revealed the very ugly places in my heart, and I resent those places.

I am thankful that God is gracious and forgiving. A God of second chances -- because the cry of despair isn't pretty. So many people seem to have it all together, but I am not one of them. I know God is real, I know He has a plan, and I know that my heart is struggling to accept His plan. I also know that the victory is His and He will complete that which He has already begun.

So for today -- I don't know when our boys will come home. But I do love a God who asks me to trust. Lord, please give me the strength to be still and trust.

We do appreciate those of you who pray for us and ask you to please keep praying. We are having problems getting the second passport because they look so much alike -- yes, they are twins. Please pray that this can be resolved quickly.

2009-08-23T11:06:00.003-04:00

I was so excited to receive an academic update on our boys! I am heavy into my lessons plans for the year and it is exciting to have this information to work with. I am a little familiar with their curriculum, but didn't really have any idea where they were in it, so I am delighted to begin planning for them.

I know that until we really get them home and begin working with them I won't be able to develop a full plan, but I am so excited about the possibilities I see

Moving along-- slowly

2009-08-22T21:31:00.000-04:00

We are thankful to say that we have one passport- but unfortunately only one. We always seem to take longer than given parameters, but we are grateful that things are progressing. Hopefully there won't be much more waiting!

Building Bears for the Boys

2009-08-19T21:17:00.002-04:00

So we have had one Build a Bear, but needed a second one since we have 2 boys coming home -- SOON we hope! Since the boys have an athletic room, soccer was the theme chosen for this cute little guy! It was a family affair and we can't wait to share it with the boys!

2009-08-19T09:22:00.005-04:00

Edit post

One of the boy's good friends came home this weekend -- that makes 2 of their buddies, this summer, who are now home with their forever families! We are so excited for these families and can't wait till our boys are home and can perhaps skype their friends from Haiti.

We were able to send them a small package this time and in return received these pictures. Praying for the day we don't have to send packages or wait for pictures anymore.

Delay Does Not Mean Denial------

2009-08-10T13:02:00.003-04:00

These are the words of encouragement I received from my prayer group this morning. YES, there has been alot of delay, but we can never lose faith for THE ONE who began it will bring it to completion!

These are the BEST!

2009-08-06T13:51:00.002-04:00

So excited to see the smiles!! Could it be they have an inkling that they are getting closer to coming home! Oh we can't wait!!!

PRAISING OUR FATHER!

2009-07-29T15:18:00.004-04:00

I cannot believe that I can finally say, "We are out of MOI!" We have waited 9.5 months and our hearts have been missing our boys something fierce! We thank you Jesus for these 2 precious boys! Please bring them home soon!!

2009-07-20T15:38:00.002-04:00

Anyone who has been on this road of adoption (at least from Haiti) most likely knows the difficulty of the lengthy process. Our hearts are certainly weary from the wait and we long for our boys to come home!

Today I was encouraged by this post from another family who certainly has a heart for the orphan. I have met so many wonderful people who care about the orphans of this world, and I am so thankful for each of them who loves like Jesus. This post, however, connected with my heart as I have been thinking about creating my own Memorial Box. But not only the memorial box struck a chord, but the story included -- the story of a child God brought into their family and a mother's heart that God encouraged when she struggled to believe that no one really cared about her little boy. God cared enough to encourage their heart, and I have to believe he will continue to sustain us as we wait.

Boys updated weight

2009-07-15T12:55:00.002-04:00

JULY 13: Ezekiel-56.2, 50 in

Ezekias-69.6 lbs, 54 in

Happy Haiti

2009-07-10T11:00:00.000-04:00

From our point of view, looking at the poorest country in the Western Hemisphere and hearing that they are one of the Happiest Countries seems difficult to understand or comprehend. But out of 143 countries, Haiti placed 42nd, while the US was 114th.

I have met some of those people, and their joy makes my heart sing when I remember them. I am so glad that in the midst of their daily struggle, there is some joy! You can read more about this here

WAITING

2009-07-09T10:27:00.004-04:00

I honestly cannot remember any other wait in my life that has been more difficult or painful. The wait to bring our boys home ---- and the silence is DEAFENING! Never before have I lived my life so close to tears. It doesn't take much to move me there any more. AND never before have I been so broken before God.

It has been almost 2.5 years since God called us to this adoption and that same time He called us to grad school .... and we are tired. But as I reflect on these two and a half years, I see Him, not always how I want Him, but nevertheless still here. He knows me by name, He loves me, and at times even carries me.

The past few days God has begun calling me to praise. Remember the phrase, "I will praise Him in the storm." My heart is there and at times it is a choice to see Him, to listen to Him, and to praise Him. That is where I find myself today -- knowing I am called to praise Him.

Yesterday I listened to a Family Life Today podcast with Pastor Ed Underwood who suffers from a lymphoma that directly affects his skin. Think deep itching and severe burns all over your body. He has suffered for 7 years and came to a place, after years in the ministry, where he didn't see God anymore. The suffering was too great and he was planning to end his own life. This is a little of what he shared.

"Tom Skinner of the Washington Redskins said, "I spent a long time trying to come to grips with my doubts when suddenly I realized I had better come to grips with what I believe. I have since moved from the agony of questions that I cannot answer to the reality of answers that I cannot escape. And its a great relief.'

Bruce Wilkinson told Ed "You need a discipline of praise" and his response back was something like - "easy for you to say Mr. Jabez." (He wrote the book Prayer of Jabez)

He goes on to share that this reflection of praise was huge in his journey back to our loving Father. Sometimes I wonder how loving God can be when the world is so full of hurt-- but He is!He goes on to share, "Safe words speak truth. They speak truth in ways that relationships comes through too. And they are words that don't protect God. They are words that CONNECT to God.... You need verses, and you need truth that connects you to God. God doesn't need protection, He's God."

God knows our hearts are breaking, He knows we want answers -- He knows it all. Yet He is GOOD, He is FAITHFUL, He is MYSTERIOUS, He is COMPASSIONATE, and He gives us PEACE and STRENGTH in the midst of our darkness.

June Update Photos

2009-06-19T21:13:00.000-04:00

Still missing these Precious Faces--

2009-06-17T10:57:00.003-04:00

These pictures were taken by someone who delivered a package to the boys from us on a recent missions trip. It is so good to see them, but I just want to hold them! It has officially been one year since we have seen them and my heart is ready to pack up and board the next plane! Oh if only we could!

In the meantime- we keep praying and we keep trusting.....

2009-06-11T21:37:00.002-04:00

According to our most recent update they have secured the document that we have been waiting for and now we are waiting for it to be legalized. This can take at least a couple of weeks, so we continue to wait.

I wait to see those precious little faces, to wrap my arms around them, and to tell them that I love them. But although we still wait, we wait with HOPE, we wait with PEACE, and we rejoice in the lives of our precious boys not yet home!

Phil. 1:6 --"Being confident of this very thing, that he which has begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ:"

Will You Help?

2009-06-07T20:57:00.004-04:00

The orphanage where the boys are is in a real financial crisis. They provide wonderful care for the kids and I know their needs are being met. That being said, perhaps God would lead you to give a gift to help them continue their care and share Jesus with the children. Please take a moment to consider the needs of these children.

Dear Friends,

We hope this email finds you well and enjoying the warmer weather of summer. We are in Haiti now and it’s hot, but a great relief from the colder climate we live in, in the US.

We are writing to you today asking for much needed help.We are facing a financial shortfall of approximately $100k for 2009.The longer adoption process times as well as the challenging economy all over the world is taking its toll on Haiti and on the orphanage.

As I sit here in the office, the generator is humming loudly outside the window, a nanny is mopping up the floor after the toddlers enjoyed a lunch of rice and black bean sauce, hammers are banging loudly as missionaries that have come to serve are making improvements and some youth missionaries are cleaning up the remains of water balloons in the backyard.

None of this would take place without your help. I realize that you may hear this in many pleas, but I believe I still need to say it.These children would not be in the safety of this home without you. They would not have just completed a day of VBS and heard the story of Daniel in the Lion’s Den. Their days before entering the orphanage do not provide for many feedings of their bellies, or of the souls.

We launched a campaign last month that we call Fifty2K. We are looking for 2000 one-time donors of $50 to help us get through our shortfall. It’s not an easy task at all and we are in desperate need of your help. With only 1000 people on our email list and the shortfall effecting us already, we need some miracles. If everyone that received this letter will donate $50 and find one more person to do the same, we can do this. Please help us.

Yesterday I saw a new little girl I had not seen before. She was washing clothes with the nannies and carrying a large basin of water on her head. I called out to her
and asked her to come to me so I could meet her. She broke into a smile that lit the whole orphanage up. Such a lovely girl!

Geurdi is a new little girl in the orphanage. She gave a letter to a Manager here at the orphanage to give to me when I arrived. It reads: “My name is Geurdi. I don’t
have an adoption family. I am ten years old. I want you to help me pray and find me a family “please” because my both parents died. Their lives is gone. I love you. Thank you for talking this letter”.

Geurdi has a testimony much like the other children in the orphanage. She loves to serve others and pours out all that is in her.

Last night, Pastor Kirk who is leading the mission team we have in Haiti now from Grand Junction. CO, was sharing with us that we have to have servant’s hearts. Our cups can only be filled to the top. Once they are full, we have to pour out to make room for more filling. He said that often times when we are filled back up by the Lord, it’s better than what we poured out.

Guerdi is Pastor Kirk’s message lived out. With nothing left but Jesus, having lost her family, Guerdi pours out to others. Her smile is evidence of Jesus’ filling and
indwelling – an outpour of her strength of mercy.

Please consider helping us to keep serving and keep pouring out to others here in Haiti. If you would, please consider sending this email on to anyone that might be willing to help. We so appreciate all your support and your prayers and consideration of this urgent plea.

With every blessing,

Linda J. Kohn, Director
For His Glory Outreach
www.ForHisGloryOutreach.org
MesiSenye@aol.com
719-217-7698
A ministry to the people of Haiti

Lean not unto thy own understanding....

2009-06-02T19:45:00.002-04:00

Throughout this journey I have often made the statement, "I don't understand why we have to miss so much of their lives," or "I will never understand why this process has to take so long." Last week God reminded me of this verse -- "Trust in the LORD with all your heart; and lean not to your own understanding." Prov. 3:5

I have known this verse since childhood, but never did I realize its application to my life - here and now. I am not called to know, to understand. My call is to simply trust -- TRUST.

2009-05-30T15:14:00.001-04:00

KISSES IN THE WIND (The Waiting Child's Lullaby)

I hold you in my heart and touch you in my dreams. You are here each day with me, at least that's how it seems. I know you wonder where we are... what's taking us so long. But remember child, I love you so and God will keep you strong. Now go outside and feel the breeze and let it touch your skin... Because tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind. May God hold you in His hand until we can be with you. I promise you, my darling, we're doing all that we can do. Very soon, you'll have a family for real, not just pretend. But for tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind. May God wrap you in His arms and hold you very tight. And let the angels bring the kisses that I send to you each night.

by Pamela Durkota

Our Boys--

2009-05-30T15:04:00.003-04:00

Last night I spoke to our friend who took this picture of the boys for us, and he said several times how sweet these two are. We definitely agree and cannot wait till we get them home!

With summer here, N desperately feels the need for more boys in this household and our hearts miss them terribly, but we are still praying and trusting an awesome God!

I Just Talked To My Boys!

2009-05-25T21:37:00.001-04:00

Tonight I was given the most wonderful surprise!! A wonderful adoptive parent who is in Haiti right now called and gave us the opportunity to speak to those sweet little voices! What a delight, but oh so hard when they said "I want to see you." I told them to keep praying and then assured them that we are fervently praying for them to come home too!

This last week has been a struggle as we were told that another document has to be redone and of course that means more waiting. Tonight God blessed us with the precious reminder that he still cares. I am so thankful for his faithful reminders!

Thankful Hearts

2009-05-17T22:04:00.003-04:00

My dear precious boys---

I have loved you since God placed deep within me the conviction that you were to be ours. It is now well over 2 years since we had begun the process to bring you home and yet we are still separated by the miles. I still remember those shy little faces who whispered so quietly to me when I first met you and asked you if you knew who I was, and I still remember those big smiles and laughs from the time we spent together last year!

What I haven't shared with you is how thankful I am for you! Thankful that God chose us to be your forever family. Thankful for your thoughtful and caring hearts. Thankful for the way you look out for each other and the way that you enjoy life. There is much joy in your play and great delight in the pleasures that we see as so simple.

We love you dearly and are counting the days- however long they may be, until you are with us always!

2009-04-29T21:45:00.002-04:00

The reality is that I have been struggling, my heart is struggling the longer the wait goes on. I know that God is in control. I believe God has a plan. I know that His ways are not my ways. And yes, I know that I am struggling to surrender it all completely to Him. He IS good. He IS faithful. I do believe. But somewhere along this road I have lost the joy of my salvation and my faith wavers with my emotions that crush my heart.

I am so thankful for the incredible man God has given me to share this journey with. Today he posted this. When it is all done and said, may I have the faith to trust my daddy completely too.

Loving these smiles; Growing Weary in the wait

2009-04-28T20:56:00.000-04:00

A Lesson From Gladys Aylward

2009-04-21T16:03:00.003-04:00

I don' believe I had ever heard of the missionary to China, Gladys Alyward, until several years ago when I first read her story to our kids as part of our homeschool curriculum. Now three years later, I once again find myself reading this story to my kids and being challenged in ways I never dreamed.

Gladys was a young women who strongly believed that God called her to the mission field of China.

*She flunked out of the mission school training program, but never lost her calling.

*She made contact with a widow missionary serving in China and saved for months to pay her train fare from England to China. Due to a language barrier and war going on, she ended up in the middle of Russia stripped completely of her money and most of her provisions. The officials finally put her onto a train headed to inland Russia where she was suppose to serve as a machinist.

*After several days she escaped from Russia on a Japanese ship, as their prisoner, and was delivered to the British Authorities who helped her get to China. She still believed in her calling.

*The missionary she planned to meet in China didn't really believe a housemaid would actually come to Tiensten, China and was now living in another province. She still believed in her calling.

*Gladys traveled another 25 days to get to the location she had believed this missionary to be only to discover that she was now living another 2 days journey away by mules. She still believed in her calling.

There was nothing easy about getting to China or even locating the missionary that Gladys planned to serve with. God did not hand her a silver platter. God never 'rescued' her in ways I know He certainly could have. Yet Gladys Aylward never lost sight of her calling. She was confident in her calling, kept her eyes on the one who called, and pressed on. Ultimately God used her in miraculous ways to serve the Chinese people and call them to Himself!

What is it about this story that calls to my soul? That makes me feel like I can relate? It is the fact that I have to remember my calling. Where God has led us and to never take my eyes off of Him or that call.

Many days there is a weariness I feel at the end of another day of not hearing anything at all about our boys or the adoption that we have been at for over 2 years. My flesh tells me that they will never come home, or sometimes I just want to give up because my heart hurts so much. Yet, I cannot believe Satan's lies. I cannot lose sight of our calling.

I will never understand the "whys" of this process, but I do know that I want to be faithful to our calling. I want to be faithful to Him. So Jesus, today, I ask for the strength to be faithful to the call.

....and please bring our boys home soon.

Just Hanging Around

2009-04-19T21:04:00.000-04:00

These Smiles Make Our Hearts Sing!

2009-04-15T18:04:00.000-04:00

Keep It Current

2009-04-08T09:03:00.003-04:00

We just found out that are files are be held back in MOI because our driver's license has expired. Of course we have renewed them and its simple enough, I guess, to scan them, I wish I had known they had to have current copies. I hate anything that slows down the process, but especially something I could have taken care of had I known.

So heads up to all of you who have expired driver's licenses-- or you have updated them since you mailed it with your dossier, keep it current!

Why?

2009-03-30T08:17:00.000-04:00

After being in MOI for 6 months, I am often asked "Why does it take so long?" Here is the latest news regarding what it happening there.

Vera says, "Currently, there are about 350 files inside the downstairs MOI office. There are about 200 files in the upstairs (Office of Juritique) office.

About 30 files were having passport authorization letters typed up on Friday morning. Thus, there is movement. :))

One of the hold ups, as I have written about before, is that for all documents that have only a half-page archive, i.e. birth or death certificates that are less than one year old and all adoption decrees (since most of them are less than one year old) have to receive a letter from the Ministry of Justice (MOJ) to certify the original document's authenticity.

Obtaining those letters can take time, just like getting an archive certificate can take time. Also, for several files that I worked on, MOJ made some typing errors on its certification letter and thus MOI would not accept it. For example, if the adoption date was August 22, 2008 and the letter states August 23, 2008, then the letter is not going to be accepted. A new certification letter has to be obtained. (FRUSTRATING!)

Also, MOI only has office hours for orphanages/lawyers to come in to submit paperwork or to do the interviews on Thursday and Friday. In the past, they received orphanages/lawyers five days per week."

God is bigger than all of this, so please pray with us that our boys will come home soon. We never dreamed that we would be looking at our 3rd Easter without them being with us.

March Updates

2009-03-29T19:30:00.003-04:00

These are a couple of the best individual pictures that we have gotten recently and I can't wait to get them printed! (Thanks Lisa and Jodi)

The most recent word we have had (still in MOI after 6 months) is that all of our paperwork is submitted and hopefully things will be moving soon. That is certainly our prayer!

Look mom it's time for some Hoops!

2009-03-21T20:17:00.012-04:00

I have been struggling so much lately simply with just missing the boys. It has been so long since I have loved on these precious boys, delighted in their laughter, and hung out with these guys!

Recently there have been some other adoptive parents who traveled to the orphanage and graciously shared their pictures with the rest of us. I find myself fervently searching each picture just to capture a glimpse of the boys, and today I was delighted to find quite a few! Thank you Lisa!

I was excited to see that someone had taken a basketball hoop and hung it up for the kids to play with and then heard that they also built a soccer goal for them too. I know the kids have to be thrilled! I am so thankful for those who invested these things in the orphanage and our kids!

My favorite story that Lisa shared was that she told one of the boys that she knew their mom. His immediate response was to question her as to my name to see if she really knew me. I know they can't possibly understand why they can't come home, but I hope they know we love them!

HOPE

2009-03-08T17:56:00.001-04:00

Meet Hope. This is a bear that our 6 year old brought to me this morning and said, "Mom, her name is Hope, because we hope the boys will be home soon!"

I am so glad our kids have hope and that our God is one of hope!

We never would have thought...

2009-03-05T16:36:00.002-05:00

Never did we dream the journey would be so long,
Nor did we understand how 2 precious boys would become so much of a part of our hearts and family.

Lets Sing!

2009-03-01T13:30:00.002-05:00

Love these faces!

2009-03-01T12:42:00.004-05:00

We have met some pretty wonderful people on this adoption journey! Recently one of them went to visit their adoptive kids and our boys were able to go swimming with them and to check out the guitar! I love to see these smiling faces!

Happy Birthday Boys!

2009-02-26T07:55:00.004-05:00

Dear Boys,
Today you turn 9 years old. When I think about all that we have missed with you in the last nine years, my heart grows sad. Yet when I think of your smiles, your delight in the simplest of pleasures, your giggles, and the joy that you have brought to our lives I thank God for you! We never dreamed that we would have to watch 2 birthdays pass without you here, but yet God knows.

I will never forget celebrating your birthday at the orphanage last year, and as soon as they presented you with your slice of cake you came and gave it to us, your mom and dad. We were so overwhelmed!!! What big and generous hearts you have!

Boys, we love you more than words can say and cannot wait until God brings you home! We pray for that every day!!

Happy Birthday Boys!!

I Just Love These Faces

2009-01-29T10:40:00.003-05:00

When we receive updated pictures of the boys it is like getting candy! We love it! We only wish you would be home by your birthday next month!

A Loss

2009-01-09T08:08:00.004-05:00

This morning we just heard that one of the precious little girls at the orphanage passed away. Not only does our heart grieve her loss, but our hearts hurt for her adoptive family and all those at the orphanage who loved and cared for her. If you think of little Esperancia today, please say a prayer for those who loved and cared for her.

To see her memorial visit here

Wishing you a Merry Christmas

2008-12-31T11:14:00.000-05:00

Our Dear Boys,
The Holiday have drawn to a close, and once again you were not here to celebrate with us. Last year we prayed for miracles, and we will continue to pray you home. We only hope it is soon!

God is teaching us much about His timing, even though we may never understand. We picture you here in the midst of our chaos, looking at Christmas lights, en captured by the advent story, preparing gifts for your siblings, singing Christmas carols, and just delighting in the joy of it all!

It has been 6 long months since we have seen you, but in our hearts it feels like an eternity!

A friend's precious daughter shared this song with us, and though it makes us cry -- it makes us think of you and all of the other families who have left a piece of their hearts across the world.

MERRY CHRISTMAS by Third Day
There's a little girl trembling on a cold December morn
Crying for momma's arms
At an orphanage just outside a little China town
There the forgotten are

But half a world away I hang the stockings by the fire
And dream about the day when I can finally call you mine

It's Christmas time again but you're not home
Your family is here and yet you're somewhere else alone
And so tonight I pray that God will come and hold you in his arms
And tell you from my heart I wish you Merry Christmas

As I hang the tinsel on the tree and watch the twinkling lights
I'm warmed by the fire's glow
Outside the children tumble in a wonderland of white,
Make angels in the snow

But half a world away you try your best to fight the tears
And hope that heaven's angels come to carry you here

It's Christmas time again but you're not home
Your family is here and yet you're somewhere else alone
And so tonight I pray that God will come and hold you in his arms
And tell you from my heart I wish you Merry Christmas

Christmas is a time to celebrate the holy child
And we celebrate his perfect gift of love
He came to earth to give his life
And prepare a place for us
So we could have a home with him above

It's Christmas time again and now you're home
Your family is here so you will never be alone
So tonight before you go to sleep, I'll hold you in my arms
And I'll tell you from my heart, and I'll you from my heart
I wish you Merry Christmas

Boys, in our hearts we hold you close and can't wait till you are home! May this be the year God brings our family together!!

We still remember....

2008-12-25T22:10:00.000-05:00

Though you may not be here to open these gifts, your siblings did it for you. It is our heartfelt prayer that there will be no more Christmas' without you!

Finally, some news!!

2008-12-18T15:11:00.002-05:00

It has been almost a month since we were first told that we were having problems with one of the boy's files getting kicked out of MOI. Today we were told that BOTH boy's files are in MOI and I am hoping that means that it won't be kicked out again! We are hopeful and excited!

New Picture!!

2008-12-16T19:56:00.001-05:00

There is nothing like finding a new picture of our boys! And at least they look happy! If only we could bring them home!

While I Am Waiting

2008-12-03T12:42:00.002-05:00

Last night Rob and I had the opportunity to see the Fireproof movie which was good on so many accounts. But to both of us, this song by John Waller jumped out. May we be able to live out the truth of this song while we wait for God to bring our boys home.

I’m waiting
I’m waiting on You, Lord
And I am hopeful
I’m waiting on You, Lord
Though it is painful
But patiently, I will wait

I will move ahead, bold and confident
Taking every step in obedience

While I’m waiting
I will serve You
While I’m waiting
I will worship
While I’m waiting
I will not faint
I’ll be running the race
Even while I wait

I’m waiting
I’m waiting on You, Lord
And I am peaceful
I’m waiting on You, Lord
Though it’s not easy
But faithfully, I will wait
Yes, I will wait

I will serve You while I’m waiting
I will worship while I’m waiting
I will serve You while I’m waiting
I will worship while I’m waiting
I will serve You while I’m waiting
I will worship while I’m waiting on You, Lord

Highs and Lows

2008-11-20T12:23:00.003-05:00

An hour ago we received the news that one of our boys file has been kicked out of MOI 3 times. Our hearts were broken has we realized that any hope of our boys coming home soon has quickly been taken away. We have no idea what God is up to, but we desperately need Him!

This journey has sure had its highs and it lows, sometimes coming hand in hand. Today was another one of those times. As I cried to my husband on the phone and then with my children who said, "can we pray mom?" I am once again reminded of the importance of faith -- faith when it all seems so impossible. I am reminded how God tells us to have the faith of a child. As my youngest poured out her heart to God, she reminded us that He does give and He does take away. My son shared his brokenness with our Father as He reminded Him that he has never had brothers before and he so desperately wants them to come home. We talked about Jeremiah 29:11 and then we left it there in God's hands.

We don't claim to understand and yes we hurt for all the time we are missing with our boys. But I am so thankful for a God who is God no matter what, for children who remind of that, and I know there are so many out there who understand.

2008-11-07T14:28:00.003-05:00

A group from our agency was in Haiti this last week meeting their kids and filing some paperwork. I had the opportunity to send something small with one of the adoptive moms to deliver to our boys, and this is what she shared with us on her return home. Your boys are SO handsome and they lit up with smiles when I gave them their photos/treats. One of them...not sure which one? said, Yes....when I read them the message from you. You will be able to tell which one that was on the video I'm sure. It was really cute. I want them home with you SOON! They miss you!

It may not be much in the way of news, but it sure warms my heart! Getting pictures will be an added treat! Thank you!!!

It's Just another step, but...

2008-11-05T09:36:00.002-05:00

We just received word that our DNA has been taken! It will take several weeks for this to be processed, but at least they can begin the processing part. For that we are so grateful. It feels like forever that we have been praying regarding this one little step (I know that isn't reality!) that could potentially hold things up in the end.

Just encouraged that things are moving.

New Picture!

2008-11-01T10:33:00.003-04:00

I love this picture but can't believe the size difference this time!

We have finally entered MOI!

2008-10-16T18:59:00.003-04:00

Today was the day we heard the words we have been waiting for---- "your file has just entered MOI." Supposedly they are processing files in 8-12 weeks, also the amount of time DNA can take (which still hasn't been drawn). So, now we continue to trust and pray for another miracle!!!

Learning to Wait

2008-10-14T15:44:00.002-04:00

Every stage feels so painfully long. Almost 9 months in IBESR was definitely the longest, but once we were out of there I think we felt as if we 'deserved' our files to fly through the rest of the process. We are encouraged, because at least our file is slowly progressing. For over 2 weeks now we have been waiting to hear that we have simply entered MOI, the last stage for the Haitian part of the adoption. We are also waiting to hear that DNA has been drawn. WAIT, WAIT, WAIT -- so we choose to wait upon the Lord, trusting that His timing is perfect.

2008-10-05T19:16:00.004-04:00

My dearest boys,

How our hearts long for you to be a part of us here, in our very home. Not a day goes by when someone doesn't mention you and I picture you here, right in our midst. It has been many months since I last held your hands and kissed your sweet faces goodbye, but every night I ask our Heavenly Father to encourage your hearts and to keep you safe. I hope you never give up hope that one day soon you will be coming home on that airplane you so desperately want to get on.

I never knew how precious the memories of our visits would prove to be as I long to bring you home and hold you tight. When I think of your laughter and smiles, it warms my heart. When I remember how you fearfully learned to trust as I swam with you and you worked up the courage to finally jump into my arms off of the waterfall, it swells my heart with pride! When I remember your delight with cartoons and your enthusiasm to master your sister's Game Boy, it makes my heart smile.

Your siblings anxiously await your arrival, and your brother desperately needs you to help him balance the scales! "So many girls," he says! We pray you will be home soon, and someday in the future, when you may read this you will be reminded that the wait was long for us too! You are already in our hearts, and we long for the day you come home!

With Love,
Dad and Mom

Haiti update from CNN 9/30/2008

2008-10-05T18:58:00.003-04:00

Many often ask us about the status of Haiti since the hurricanes devastated much of the country. Here is a recent update from CNN.

"While I'mWaiting"

2008-09-29T20:51:00.002-04:00

This is the coolest song that was shared through our adoption agency group. Lord, may this be a picture of our heart as we wait for you to bring our boys home.

While I’m Waiting - John Waller

I’m waiting
I’m waiting on You, Lord
And I am hopeful
I’m waiting on You, Lord
Though it is painful
But patiently, I will wait I will move ahead, bold and confident
Taking every step in obedience
While I’m waiting
I will serve You
While I’m waiting
I will worship
While I’m waiting
I will not faint
I’ll be running the race
Even while I wait

I’m waiting
I’m waiting on You, Lord
And I am peaceful
I’m waiting on You, Lord
Though it’s not easy
But faithfully, I will wait
Yes, I will wait
I will serve You while I’m waiting
I will worship while I’m waiting
I will serve You while I’m waiting
I will worship while I’m waiting
I will serve you while I’m waiting
I will worship while I’m waiting on You, Lord

Past Another Hurdle

2008-09-26T19:09:00.002-04:00

We were delighted to hear that our file has finally received the stamp we have been waiting for to clear us from Second Legal!! This process seems so painfully slow, and yet God keeps telling to keep the faith. Our prayer is now to enter MOI quickly, exit, and have this DNA test happen quickly. This is truly the last stage for the Haitian side of the adoption and we are so anxious for our boys to come home!

Latest Update

2008-09-25T22:16:00.004-04:00

Latest update--- we have to get DNA done to verify that the boys dad is really their dad, even though they look just like him. We had forgotten this was even a possibility since they look so much like their birth dad, so this really took us by surprise.

2008-09-25T13:16:00.003-04:00

When I cannot understand my Father's leading,
And it seems to be but hard and cruel hate,
Still I hear that gentle whisper ever pleading,
God is working, God is faithful, ONLY WAIT.
from Streams in the Desert

Please Pray for Haiti

2008-09-09T07:58:00.009-04:00

This is an email that has been forwarded to us, giving us a glimpse of how terrible things are in Haiti. Please pray for provisions and safety for the people of Haiti. The word from our own orphanage is that everyone is OK, but I am sure they are feeling some of the effects of this devastation.

More rain and wind and an already wounded Haiti is devastated! The photos I have attached are of the Gonaïve area on the west coast of Haiti. Gonaïve is situated on a river that comes out of the mountains inland of Gonaive. The old colonial drainage system has not been repaired or much has been destroyed. The government has not repaired the system or put in a new system, so the city floods when we have storms that come through.

The attached photos were provide by Joel Trimble from Haiti for Christ Ministries and also, Missionary Aviation Fellowship.

We received this email from Yvonne Trimble.

Dear friend,

Ike rained and blew all night on poor Haiti. This morning it is still raining and blowing. While we are safe on a mountain in Port au Prince, the northwest of Haiti is experiencing a natural disaster of unimaginable proportions.

Tropical Storm Hanna flooded Gonaives and claimed more than 500 lives in the past week. Now Hurrican Ike is dumping more wind and rain on the battered region. This morning we received a first hand report of a missionary there who said, "Forty children in the orphanage are eating flour, because they have not had food for five days." This same missionary is using bleach to purify contaminated well water for drinking. While human and animal cadavers float in the flood waters surrounding the facility. They have no other choice though as the UN is NOT DISTRIBUTING RELIEF.

The UN received 33 tons of relief for the region yesterday and it is warehoused in Gonaives, to date they have not distributed any of it. We received a message from a Haitian pastor in Gonaives who said his wife walked 18 hours through mud and flood waters to get food for her family. She returned empty handed, even with cash she could not find food; BECAUSE THE UN IS HOLDING THE FOOD BACK IN THE WAREHOUSES. It is rumored they will sell the relief after the storm.

This same family said, they "are waiting for death." This is not an overstatement of the situation in Haiti. We need your help now. You can go on line and find the name of your Congress men and you United States Senators with their phone numbers. Call them today and tell them that the UN is NOT DISTRIBUTING RELIEF IN HAITI. That you know the situation is worsening by the minute and thousands are at risk, in fact 600,000 Haitians have been displaced without food and water for days now.

As of Sunday morning, aid had arrived in Gonaive but due to fear of rioting, it had not been distributed according to missionaries in Gonaive. People have been without food AND water for 6 days now. Orphanages in the area have children without food and water.

The UN that is suppose to distribute the food and water. The US, Canada, France, Belgium, Switzerland, Spain, The Netherlands, and other countries supporting the UN should demand that this food be distributed!

Another missionary, Licia Zachary Betor with Real Hope for Haiti, in the village of Cazele said that at 3 AM on Sunday morning, a wall of water swept through the village of Cazele. There is a small, shallow river that runs through the middle of the village. They are assuming that a mud slide in the mountains caused the wall of water to sweep down and flood the village. It took out the foot bridge over the river and swept people away. Licia heard that the road to the village was cut in half by the fast moving water and so the village is isolated, but she did not know for certain yesterday afternoon if that was true. Go to her blog at: http://haitirescuecenter.wordpress.com/ to read more about the flood.

Please be praying for Haiti. Due to the flooding and devastation, schools will not open until October 6. Your help is needed more than ever to help the Haitian children.

And life in Haiti goes on...

The Hurricane Devastation

2008-09-05T14:44:00.015-04:00

Gustav & Hanna Devastate Haiti by Leslie A. Smith

Thursday, September 04, 2008 — In the last two weeks, Haiti has been given a one-two punch from Hurricane Gustav and Tropical Storm Hanna. The rains from Gustav had barely ceased before Hanna slowly passed over Haiti’s northern coast, dropping enormous amounts of rain and causing massive flooding across the country.

The storms have taken a devastating toll on Haiti’s population. The Haitian government is reporting that nearly 80 people are dead or missing, and almost 7,000 remain in emergency shelters. According to the International Federation of Red Cross and Red Crescent Societies, approximately 650,000 people are at risk—floods and landslides have damaged or destroyed homes, hospitals, buildings and roads, making it difficult to access areas in need of help.

The American Red Cross has two staff members based in Haiti who are working closely with he Haitian Red Cross Society to help with their disaster response.

"Many areas are simply inaccessible on the ground. Right now we’re working with our international partners to assess the damage and help get relief to everyone who needs it," said Matthew Marek, Head of Programs in Haiti for the American Red Cross, who viewed the devastation from the air.

In addition to its staff based in the country, the American Red Cross is deploying two disaster relief specialists who will join the team on the ground in assessing the needs and providing relief.

Cost of Living

2008-08-31T09:29:00.004-04:00

I recently came across this note from a missionary in Haiti. These prices reflect the prices of living there and how difficult it makes for people whose average income in $2 a day.

-Rice, 100 lb bag; was $230 HA ($32 US); now costs $700 HA ($100 US)
-Canned milk by case; was $115 HA ($16 US); now costs $160 HA ($22 US)
-Cooking Oil per gallon; was $45 HA ($6.50 US); now costs $80 HA ($11 US)
-Kerosene per gallon; was $25 HA ($3.50 US); now costs $50 HA ($7 US)
-Gasoline per gallon; was $40 HA ($6 US); now costs $57 HA ($8 US).
-Cement, 66 lb bag; was $42 HA ($6 US); now costs $85 HA ($12 US)

The missionary had just sent this out at the end of August I believe so I assume these prices are fairly current.

Tropical Storm Fay Update 2

2008-08-18T11:25:00.002-04:00

The orphanage fared well, although the new storage building flooded. They were able to move all of the provisions before the flooding hit so it sounds as if there was no major problems, just inconveniences. We are thankful!

Tropical Storm Fay Update

2008-08-17T08:24:00.002-04:00

Here is the latest reports I have found. Hopefully not to much damage has been done.

"In Haiti, Fay has already flooded rice fields in the Artibonite Valley, Haiti's most fertile region, according to reports from Radio Ginen. And Fay's heavy winds destroyed banana crops in Arcahaie, north of the capital, although it is unclear how many acres were affected, said Marie Alta Jean-Baptiste, head of Haiti's civil protection department." (from the Associated Press 8/17)

This is obviously a burden for a country where people are starving by the thousands.

Tropical Storm Fay

2008-08-16T07:43:00.002-04:00

I was just reminded this morning that although all is beautiful here this weekend, Haiti is being hit by Tropical Storm Fay today. A storm like this has the potential of devastating effects on a country lacking the infrastucture we have when receiving several inches of rain - floods and mudslides are common. Please pray for this little country. Thanks Lisa for drawing my attention to the situation.

Good News!

2008-08-14T21:45:00.002-04:00

There is nothing like seeing God continue to work to make my heart sing!! Tonight we received word that we have received Judgment! Basically this means the boys are legally ours -- we need one more official stamp (Second Legal) before we enter MOI-- where passports are prepared and everything certified once again. Right now MOI is processing anywhere from 8-12 weeks, but the preparation for that office can also take a while. We are still praying they will be home by Christmas, but there is much for God to do before that will happen.

The Battle to Persevere

2008-07-31T18:25:00.003-04:00

Today is one of those days when you ask yourself "is it worth it?" Without a shadow of doubt I know the answer is YES, but the human side grows weary in the fight. Never did I dream that this process would sometimes feel like a battle. Little did I dream of the battles that we fight on our knees. It seems like the moment you begin to neglect the battle, the more the battle hurts.

Last night we learned that they were unable to locate the boy's birth father for the embassy interview this week-- thus it did not happen. There are alot of things that go into this that I don't understand. The long and the short of it coming together is that nothing is easy about this process.

In spite of it all, the truth remains -- this is God's story, He is the one that has called us, He will never leave us or forsake us. The question remains-- can I keep trusting Him? ----- My heart cries out "I have too." My soul seeks His strength as there is no other hope without Him.

New Pictures from the Orphanage

2008-07-17T21:56:00.000-04:00

We Are Out of Parquet!

2008-07-10T16:51:00.002-04:00

We just received word that our file has been signed out of Parquet. We are so excited to have moved past this office since we didn't know they how they were processing files with dispensation. Now we move onto the next step which makes them legally ours with our last name and everything-- and then into the final office of MOI. We are praying they will be home for Christmas!! That would be the BEST gift ever!

Look It's a New Picture!

2008-07-09T21:55:00.003-04:00

Yes, we did just return from a wonderful week with our boys just a few weeks ago, BUT that doesn't mean that we don't love getting new pics. Another mom who just came back posted this and many others on her blog at ourhaitianadoption.blogspot.com
Thank you Kathy!

2008-07-07T23:20:00.003-04:00

The question I hear most often is "Is there any news?" And I fear many ask with trepidation as the news is so SLOW in coming. But the blessing behind it is those who care. We are thankful for those who do ask for it is always on our hearts.

The only news for today is that our fingerprints expired. You may ask - "What, your fingerprints expire?" And we can clearly say YES! Go figure. So today we were off to USCIS in the Federal Building to be re-fingerprinted (hopefully for the last time!!). Just another step closer!

Trip Pictures

2008-06-23T21:40:00.000-04:00

To Haiti and Back Again

2008-06-22T21:37:00.003-04:00

I cannot believe that we have been to Haiti and back AGAIN! M and I had the privilege of being part of a mission's trip and the opportunity to file paperwork with the embassy there. Hopefully this will help speed up our process or at least keep it moving along!

The boys were a delight, and truly very comfortable with us! The downside of that was the heartbreak that came with saying good-bye. One of the boys literally cried for 20-30 minutes. I know that means they are attaching to us, but it was heartbreaking as well. Each visit they have been more comfortable, but this time it seemed as if there were no barriers at all.

They truly enjoyed electronics -- they loved the mp3 player, it took them about 30 seconds to master M's Gameboy, and they loved taking pictures!

They went from swimming with arm floats and the spiderman ring to swimming without anything in just one week.

Their English seemed to be improving as well. I could even ask them how to say certain words in Creole and they could easily translate it for me. The very first night they asked for ice cream and the second night they wanted coke and pizza!

M was a wonderful help and terrific big sister to them! The children at the orphanage loved her as well as she played everything from jump rope to hop-scotch. They braided her hair and always wanted to be with her. I believe it was a great experience for her too!

Riding the tap-taps was a new experience, although the boys always wanted to ride the vans (they thought the van was faster for some reason!).

Next to our boys, the sweetest thing we experienced was the heart and friendliness of the Haitians. Their lives are very hard, but many of them have such joy. I came home with a renewed heart to pray not only for this country, but these very people -- may the joy of the Lord be their strength!

2008-06-04T16:23:00.002-04:00

Did you realize that it was 25 years before God fulfilled his promise to Abraham to give him a son? The wait of this adoption journey has already seemed so hard, yet I am nowhere close to waiting 25 years. Yes, this story is about the boys that God has led us to, but more importantly I think it is about God himself revealing Himself to us. Teaching us to trust, to walk by faith, and to pray.

..."as you learn to trust Him more deeply, He will develop your character to match bigger tests, and with the greater test will come a greater love for God and knowledge of His ways." (Experiencing God Day by Day) Oh that out of this journey I may love God more deeply.

Our File Is Finally Moving!!!!

2008-05-10T15:34:00.003-04:00

Our caseworker called early this morning to deliver the news we have been waiting for!!! We are out of IBESR! It has been over 8 months since our file first entered this office. In December we found out we were in dispensation and now we have finally been signed out. We are still a long ways from bringing the boys home, but at least we are finally seeing some progress.

Please pray that as our file enters Parquet, that things will be processed quickly. No one knows how long this office may take, but we will keep trusting Him who continues to lead us on this journey. Please pray also for the many other families who are still waiting in IBESR -- we can so relate to their pain.

The Little Things Do Matter!

2008-05-07T22:05:00.001-04:00

I am amazed at how easily my heart breaks when I think about this adoption and the precious boys God has brought into our lives. It is in this heart-break that I can lose sight of who God is and how He works. It comes and it goes - some days are easier than others -- and each day I have to choose to BELIEVE! So when God chooses to use even the smallest things to show me that this journey still matters, I am encouraged!

Our church body is broken up into many housechurches that meet throughout the area to encourage, disciple, minister, and serve. A few months ago, we joined a very special group of people who have so blessed us with their love of Jesus. Last week they encouraged our hearts with a special time of prayer for Haiti and for our orphanage. Tonight, one of the guys brought me a box of his some of his favorite childhood toys for our boys to have when they come home! Thank you Lord for these blessings!

The fact that we are going on 9 months in the black hole of IBESR is hard when I think about all the precious time we are missing with our boys. Somedays I wonder if God has put us on the back-burner. But it is these things that make such a difference! Things that encourage me to stay the course, and to BELIEVE!

Jesus, please give me the strength to "press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus." (Phil. 3:14)

Praising Him--

2008-05-01T14:38:00.003-04:00

I am blown away! Not by adoption news (if only there was some), but by God's provision. In a matter of a week we have seen God provide for our orphanage in great ways! To top it off our housechurch has committed to raise additional funds by having a garage sale next month with all proceeds going to care for the children in Haiti! Another personnel contact has stepped forward to pay the remaining need on another project for the orphanage. Thank you Jesus! There is still so much more to be done for Haiti, the orphanages, and the children. Thank you for caring for the little children!

"Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?'

The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.'" (Matthew 25:37-40, NIV)

Nesting!!

2008-04-29T16:17:00.003-04:00

This past week Rob asked me if I was sure that I wasn't pregnant -- Too much 'nesting' going on at our house I guess! I told him I was 12 months pregnant and WAY overdue! That is what this adoption feels like!

How are we involved in Haiti's struggles?

2008-04-23T08:30:00.004-04:00

As we struggle to process life in Haiti, here is an article that is really thought provoking. I found this on another adoptive mom's blog and felt it worth reflecting on.

America's Role in Haiti's Hunger Riots
By Bill Quigley / t r u t h o u t | Report/Monday 21 April 2008

Riots in Haiti over explosive rises in food costs have claimed the lives of six people. There have also been food riots worldwide in Burkina Faso, Cameroon, Cote d'Ivorie, Egypt, Guinea, Mauritania, Mexico, Morocco, Senegal, Uzbekistan and Yemen.

The Economist, which calls the current crisis the silent tsunami, reports that last year wheat prices rose 77 percent and rice 16 percent, but since January rice prices have risen 141 percent. The reasons include rising fuel costs, weather problems, increased demand in China and India, and the push to create biofuels from cereal crops.

Hermite Joseph, a mother working in the markets of Port-au-Prince, told journalist Nick Whalen that her two kids are "like toothpicks - they're not getting enough nourishment. Before, if you had $1.25, you could buy vegetables, some rice, 10 cents of charcoal and a little cooking oil. Right now, a little can of rice alone costs 65 cents, and is not good rice at all. Oil is 25 cents. Charcoal is 25 cents. With $1.25, you can't even make a plate of rice for one child."

The St. Claire's Church Food program, in the Tiplas Kazo neighborhood of Port-au-Prince, serves 1,000 free meals a day, almost all to hungry children - five times a week in partnership with the What If Foundation. Children from Cité-Soleil have been known to walk the five miles to the church for a meal. The costs of rice, beans, vegetables, a little meat, spices, cooking oil and propane for the stoves, have gone up dramatically. Because of the rise in the cost of food, the portions are now smaller. But hunger is on the rise, and more and more children come for the free meal. Hungry adults used to be allowed to eat the leftovers once all the children were fed, but now there are few leftovers.

The New York Times lectured Haiti on April 18 that "Haiti, its agriculture industry in shambles, needs to better feed itself." Unfortunately, the article did not talk at all about one of the main causes of the shortages - the fact that the US and other international financial bodies destroyed Haitian rice farmers to create a major market for heavily subsidized rice from US farmers. This is not the only cause of hunger in Haiti and other poor countries, but it is a major force.

Thirty years ago, Haiti raised nearly all the rice it needed. What happened?

In 1986, after the expulsion of Haitian dictator Jean Claude "Baby Doc" Duvalier, the International Monetary Fund (IMF) loaned Haiti $24.6 million in desperately needed funds (Baby Doc had raided the treasury on the way out). But, in order to get the IMF loan, Haiti was required to reduce tariff protections for Haitian rice and other agricultural products and some industries, to open up the country's markets to competition from outside countries. The US has by far the largest voice in decisions of the IMF.

Doctor Paul Farmer was in Haiti then and saw what happened. "Within less than two years, it became impossible for Haitian farmers to compete with what they called 'Miami rice.' The whole local rice market in Haiti fell apart as cheap, US subsidized rice, some of it in the form of 'food aid,' flooded the market. There was violence ... 'rice wars,' and lives were lost."

"American rice invaded the country," recalled Charles Suffrard, a leading rice grower in Haiti in an interview with the Washington Post in 2000. By 1987 and 1988, there was so much rice coming into the country that many stopped working the land.

The Rev. Gerard Jean-Juste, a Haitian priest who has been the pastor at St. Claire and an outspoken human rights advocate, agrees. "In the 1980s, imported rice poured into Haiti, below the cost of what our farmers could produce it. Farmers lost their businesses. People from the countryside started losing their jobs and moving to the cities. After a few years of cheap imported rice, local production went way down."

Still, the international business community was not satisfied. In 1994, as a condition for US assistance in returning to Haiti to resume his elected presidency, Jean-Bertrand Aristide was forced by the US, the IMF and the World Bank to open up the markets in Haiti even more.

But Haiti is the poorest country in the Western Hemisphere; what reason could the US have for destroying the rice market of this tiny country?

Haiti is definitely poor. The US Agency for International Development reports the annual per capita income is less than $400. The United Nations reports life expectancy in Haiti is 59, while in the US it is 78. Over 78 percent of Haitians live on less than $2 a day, more than half live on less than $1 a day.

Yet, Haiti has become one of the top importers of rice from the United States. The US Department of Agriculture 2008 numbers show Haiti is the third-largest importer of US rice - at over 240,000 metric tons of rice. (One metric ton is 2,200 pounds).

Rice is a heavily subsidized business in the US. Rice subsidies in the US totaled $11 billion from 1995 to 2006. One producer alone, Riceland Foods of Stuttgart, Arkansas, received over $500 million in rice subsidies between 1995 and 2006.

The Cato Institute recently reported that rice is one of the most heavily supported commodities in the US - with three different subsidies together averaging over $1 billion a year since 1998 and projected to average over $700 million a year through 2015. The result? "Tens of millions of rice farmers in poor countries find it hard to lift their families out of poverty because of the lower, more volatile prices caused by the interventionist policies of other countries."

In addition to three different subsidies for rice farmers in the US, there are also direct tariff barriers of three to 24 percent, reports Daniel Griswold of the Cato Institute - the exact same type of protections, though much higher, that the US and the IMF required Haiti to eliminate in the 1980s and 1990s.

US protection for rice farmers goes even further. A 2006 story in The Washington Post found that the federal government has paid at least $1.3 billion in subsidies for rice and other crops since 2000 to individuals who do no farming at all; including $490,000 to a Houston surgeon who owned land near Houston that once grew rice.

And it is not only the Haitian rice farmers who have been hurt.

Paul Farmer saw it happen to the sugar growers as well. "Haiti, once the world's largest exporter of sugar and other tropical produce to Europe, began importing even sugar - from US-controlled sugar production in the Dominican Republic and Florida. It was terrible to see Haitian farmers put out of work. All this speeded up the downward spiral that led to this month's food riots."

After the riots and protests, President Rene Preval of Haiti agreed to reduce the price of rice, which was selling for $51 for a 110-pound bag, to $43 dollars for the next month. No one thinks a one-month fix will do anything but delay the severe hunger pains a few weeks.

Haiti is far from alone in this crisis. The Economist reports a billion people worldwide live on $1 a day. The US-backed Voice of America reports about 850 million people were suffering from hunger worldwide before the latest round of price increases.

Thirty-three countries are at risk of social upheaval because of rising food prices, World Bank President Robert Zoellick told The Wall Street Journal. When countries have many people who spend half to three-quarters of their daily income on food, "there is no margin of survival."

In the US, people are feeling the worldwide problems at the gas pump and in the grocery. Middle-class people may cut back on extra trips or on high price cuts of meat. The number of people on food stamps in the US is at an all-time high. But in poor countries, where malnutrition and hunger were widespread before the rise in prices, there is nothing to cut back on except eating. That leads to hunger riots.

In the short term, the world community is sending bags of rice to Haiti. Venezuela sent 350 tons of food. The US just pledged $200 million extra for worldwide hunger relief. The UN is committed to distributing more food.

What can be done in the medium term? The US provides much of the world's food aid, but does it in such a way that only half of the dollars spent actually reach hungry people. US law requires that food aid be purchased from US farmers, processed and bagged in the US and shipped on US vessels - which cost 50 percent of the money allocated. A simple change in US law to allow some local purchase of commodities would feed many more people and support local farm markets.

In the long run, what is to be done? The president of Brazil, Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva, who visited Haiti last week, said "Rich countries need to reduce farm subsidies and trade barriers to allow poor countries to generate income with food exports. Either the world solves the unfair trade system, or every time there's unrest like in Haiti, we adopt emergency measures and send a little bit of food to temporarily ease hunger."

Citizens of the US know very little about the role of their government in helping create the hunger problems in Haiti or other countries. But there is much that individuals can do. People can donate to help feed individual hungry people and participate with advocacy organizations such as Bread for the World or Oxfam to help change the US and global rules which favor the rich countries. This advocacy can help countries have a better chance to feed themselves.

Meanwhile, Merisma Jean-Claudel, a young high school graduate in Port-au-Prince, told journalist Wadner Pierre "... people can't buy food. Gasoline prices are going up. It is very hard for us over here. The cost of living is the biggest worry for us; no peace in stomach means no peace in the mind.... I wonder if others will be able to survive the days ahead, because things are very, very hard."

"On the ground, people are very hungry," reported Father Jean-Juste. "Our country must immediately open emergency canteens to feed the hungry until we can get them jobs. For the long run, we need to invest in irrigation, transportation, and other assistance for our farmers and workers."

In Port-au-Prince, some rice arrived in the last few days. A school in Father Jean-Juste's parish received several bags of rice. They had raw rice for 1,000 children, but the principal still had to come to Father Jean-Juste asking for help. There was no money for charcoal or oil.

Jervais Rodman, an unemployed carpenter with three children, stood in a long line Saturday in Port-au-Prince to get UN-donated rice and beans. When Rodman got the small bags, he told Ben Fox of The Associated Press, "The beans might last four days. The rice will be gone as soon as I get home."

Bill Quigley is a human rights lawyer and law professor at Loyola University New Orleans. He can be reached at quigley77@gmail.com. People interested in donating to feed children in Haiti should go to http://www.whatiffoundation.org/. People who want to help change US policy on agriculture to help combat worldwide hunger should go to: http://www.oxfamamerica.org/ or http://www.bread.org/.

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April Updates!

2008-04-15T21:38:00.000-04:00

Prayer Update

2008-04-12T15:02:00.003-04:00

The most recent news that we have on the situation in Haiti is that things have settled some and that the orphanage was finally able to get water trucks in. PTL! It seems that everyone is guarded and cautious, believing that this may escalate again next week.

The struggles of this country are deep seeded and need our prayer.

Please Pray for Haiti

2008-04-09T15:43:00.003-04:00

Eighteen months ago I couldn't tell you anything about Haiti. Today our hearts are broken for this country and the people who live there.
There has been much violence in Haiti the last few days -- you can read about it here.
There are people literally starving in this country. We have heard from the orphanage and they are all safe, but as all of their water is brought in from the outside - they are in need of water. The staff has also been unable to come and go they have been there for at least 2 days straight. Please pray for them and for their country.

My Call to Praise

2008-03-30T20:18:00.003-04:00

Earlier this week I felt myself really struggling. Struggling to believe, struggling to persist, struggling to have the faith. As I shared this battle with my husband, I told him that I felt like throwing a 2 year old temper tantrum! I wanted to be mad! I don't want to wait anymore!

R really challenged me to read through the book of Job in The Message. Job experienced anger-- anger is OK. But God doesn't give Job the answers he is looking for, but He does point Job to Himself.

The ironic thing is God's timing. The next morning as I sat down for my quiet time, it took me right to Job. Now if you look at who Job is, you quickly see that he is a much stronger believer than I am. He is so outstanding that in Chpt 1 God asks Satan to consider his servant Job. Yes, God had blessed him, but Job's faith was so much deeper than that. When Job received word of his losses--his servants, his livestock, and his children-- he was broken. Yet in his brokenness he responded with 'The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised."

Job praised God! That isn't my natural response. That isn't easy to choose, but oh may my faith give me the strength to trust and to praise!

Now I haven't experienced the magnitude of loss that comes anywhere close to Job, but my self-pity ranks pretty high. I have lost lots of precious time with our boys, but I will choose to believe and to trust God with their hearts. It is in that daily surrender that I struggle.

Now I have only made it through the first three chapters of Job, but already God has reminded me of so much.

Thank you God for your faithfulness, thank you for putting people in my path who point me to you. Thank you for leading us through this journey.

BLESSED BE YOUR NAME

Blessed be your name,In the land that is plentiful
Where the streams of abundance flow, Blessed be your name

Blessed be your name, When I'm found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness, Blessed be your name

Every blessing you pour out,I turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say...

Blessed be the name of the Lord,Blessed be your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord, Blessed be your glorious name

Blessed be your name, When the sun's shining down on me
When the world's all as it should be, Blessed be your name

Blessed be your name, On the road marked with suffering
Though there's pain in the offering, Blessed be your name

Every blessing you pour out, I turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord,
Still I will say...

Blessed be the name of the Lord, Blessed be your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord, Blessed be your glorious name

You give and take away, You give and take away
My heart will choose to say,

Lord, Blessed be your name

Updates!

2008-03-17T21:33:00.000-04:00

2008-03-16T10:59:00.002-04:00

Habakkuk 2:(NLT)
I will climb up into my watchtower now and wait to see what the Lord
will say to me and how He will answer my complaint. Then the Lord
said to me, "Write my answer in large, clear letters on a tablet, so
that a runner can read it and tell everyone else. But these things I
plan won't happen right away. Slowly, steadily, surely, the time
approaches when the vision will be fulfilled. If it seems slow, wait
patiently, for it will surely take place. It will not be delayed.

We love these boys!

2008-03-16T10:55:00.002-04:00

A Bit of Good News from Haiti

2008-03-14T09:40:00.001-04:00

A more encouraging article about life in Haiti here. I hope things continue to improve!

Why

2008-03-12T08:19:00.004-04:00

When I wonder why Haiti, why a place where the wait seems so long ....... I remember this.

Reflections on our Visit

2008-03-06T21:13:00.002-05:00

We had such an amazing visit with the boys! I was so afraid of how they would respond to our visit since it took them almost the whole week to warm up to me, and when they finally did-- I had to leave. But they came out with smiles on the faces and quickly took to Rob when they met him. It was wonderful to be with them again!

They have had teeth come in, they have grown slightly taller, and I believe that their English is improving as well. They truly seemed to understand us, and would occasionally speak full phrases with us. I could also ask them how to say certain words in Kreole, and they had no problem with it. Thank goodness for me!

Rob tried to teach them rock/paper/scissors-- I don't thing they were impressed. However, they did seem to enjoy basketball -- with a water bottle and a basket, baseball -- with a plunger and small squares of wood, and most of all -- wrestling! It was a delight to hear my boys giggling together!

Unfortunately the hotel pool was closed, but our work days were pretty long and we were tired at the end of the day. So much was accomplished at the orphanage! And the kids were all a delight! It was neat to see how much some of these little ones had grown, and it was surprising how many of the children and staff seemed to remember me.

We had the privilege of being at the orphanage for their monthly birthday party. This was especially neat as our boys were celebrating their birthday. It was so precious when the boys brought us their cake to share with us. These kids have absolutely no problem sharing!

I have no idea how long it will be before the boys can come home, but they are forever entwined in our hearts! We will keep praying and keep trusting!